Commentary: All this anger over voyeurism but what we need is respect
SINGAPORE: Since the National Academy of Singapore (NUS) sexual misconduct incident erupted on social media, the Net has been abuzz with a multitude of articles and opinions.
Many are aroused. Angry with the punishment that the perpetrator received, angry with what looks like the failure of NUS to protect its pupil on campus and the mishandling of the case later, and angry with the audacity of the perpetrator.
Many are out for claret, calling for harsher penalisation and urging for greater accountability and transparency.
Yet earlier we take up our pitchforks, we should recognise that we are not privy to the finer details of the case. Peradventure we should hold off on passing judgement or taking matters into our own hands lest the conversation degenerates into a digital lynching fuelled by mob instincts.
WHY ARE THEY HAPPENING?
The consequence that has been at the forefront of my mind has more to do with why such incidences are occurring in the first place. Voyeuristic acts seem to be on the rise.
READ: The Big Read: Singapore's voyeurism problem – what's wrong with men, or the world?
In February 2019, voyeurism was identified as a key emerging offense trend that had to exist tackled when the new Criminal Law Reform Bill was first read in Parliament, then information technology'southward clear regime recognise this is definitely an result of concern.
This might exist in part facilitated past the rise in applied science, or because more cases seem to exist coming out when our women are condign more and more willing to speak out against injustice.
Still, the report of the Penal Lawmaking Review Committee submitted in August 2018, which the Government had accepted, highlighted that "a strong and consequent response" will be needed to criminalise the "surreptitious recording of others in circumstances of undress".
Meanwhile, in South Korea, the sex activity crime scandal involving G-pop's biggest stars is some other extremely troubling matter. Many cite the Korean civilisation of toxic masculinity and the objectification of women that allow such cases to flourish.
READ: BIGBANG's Seungri's sexual practice scandal and the cease of K-pop's innocence, a commentary
WHAT HAPPENED TO RESPECT?
Dorsum to our question of why these are happening in the beginning place, is it also similarly a case of our men are not respecting our women enough?
In modernistic Singapore, are women notwithstanding being undervalued and if so, why?
In a recent survey on gender equality in Singapore released by marketplace inquiry firm Ipsos, about 45 per cent of Singaporeans agree that women who wear revealing clothes should not complain if men brand comments virtually their appearance - this is a perspective held almost equally by both men and women.
Views like this brood a culture that puts the responsibleness on the victim rather than the perpetrator. Perchance it is on us to examine our own gender lens and get rid of sometime-fashioned notions similar this.
READ: Spy cameras, illicit filming and upskirt photos - Are you beingness watched?
This is an important issue close to my heart - The Singapore Council of Women's Organisations (SCWO) has been working towards the ideals of "Equal Vocalization, Equal Space, Equal Worth" for women in Singapore.
Such voyeuristic acts go confronting what nosotros stand for by violating a women'south basic right to condom space and makes futile the demand for consent and respect. No woman, nay no human, should exist made to experience like they are non rubber in ordinary twenty-four hour period-to-day situations.
Everyone, women or men, should be entitled to peace of listen. This is peculiarly so in private moments and in private spaces - irresolute rooms and toilets no less.
It is not fifty-fifty almost "no means no" when no question was even asked in the first identify.
It boils downward to respect - respecting that a woman's body is hers and no one else is entitled to information technology. Consent is key.
ALL Virtually RESPECT
More than ever, we need to reassure our women that they have rights to their privacy and empower them to speak out when that is violated. We need to work towards a club where mutual respect between the sexes is the expectation and not a privilege.
Laws can change only in lodge to get in that location, nosotros need to beginning at dwelling. We teach our children the importance of respecting another person's belongings, not to steal or touch other people'south things, just do we emphasise that same letters regarding our bodies?
Just every bit we teach our daughters that their bodies are private spaces, nosotros should as well educate our sons on the important messages of respect and consent. From a young historic period, we should teach boys that girls are equals, they are people and not objects – it is well-nigh respecting people, irrespective of gender.
We must exist careful how we speak about women and girls, and permit go of seemingly harmless things we say like "if he's teasing y'all, it must mean he likes you lot!"
READ: Here'southward what zero tolerance towards sexual misconduct looks like, a commentary
That said, nosotros need to also teach our children the importance of accepting personal responsibleness for their own conduct. Nosotros need to ingrain this in them from young and so that when they grow up, they are enlightened that their actions affect non just themselves, but others as well.
Just as how others are responsible for their own deportment, nosotros are responsible for our own bodies, their utilize and portrayal. I think society as a whole would benefit from having more responsible individuals.
DON'T TAKE Office IN MISOGYNISTIC CONVERSATIONS
Beyond our children, among our peers, it is on u.s. to pass on the message of consent and respect equally well.
Nosotros need to stand up firm and reject to partake in conversations that objectify women, and to call out others who do.
By refusing to participate even in casual misogynistic conversations and jokes, we would be taking a clear stance to show others the importance of respecting women.
But equally voyeuristic content would occur far less if there was no audition for the distribution of such materials, such a misogynistic culture would be reduced if fewer partake in it. Do not feed the fire.
MORE Likely TO ASSUME A VICTIM IS MAKING IT Upwards?
We should also encourage victim reporting and back up those who step frontwards and dare to speak out like Monica Baey.
READ: Academy campuses must be rubber places for all, a commentary
The same Ipsos survey plant that 41 per cent of all Singaporeans agree or strongly hold that fake accusations of sexual harassment are a bigger problem than unreported acts of sexual harassment.
This troubling finding speaks of a order that is more probable to assume a victim is making it up than worry most those that suffer in silence. This presents a very worrying mental attitude that victims have to overcome in order to be heard.
What would a society where mutual respect exists between the sexes expect like? I meet it equally one where if a adult female'south modesty is assaulted, she knows that she tin can take it to someone with authority, and trust that she will exist taken seriously and a fair penalization will be upheld.
I encounter it every bit one where no ane laughs at misogynistic jokes or better yet, no ane even makes them.
One twenty-four hour period nosotros volition not have to warn our daughters non to "courtroom problem" with the mode they clothes because we would have taught our sons the importance of respect.
Only then would nosotros have accomplished "Equal Voice, Equal Infinite and Equal Worth".
Nosotros are clearly not where we would like to be.
Junie Foo is First Vice-President of the Singapore Council of Women's Organisations (SCWO).
Source: https://cnalifestyle.channelnewsasia.com/commentary/commentary-all-anger-over-voyeurism-what-we-need-respect-282741
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